My surgery was scheduled for next Wednesday, 6th May. Having been ready for this moment since late December when I was told that I needed operating on, I was in the right sort of mindset for it. It's hard to explain for people not in the situation, but you have to mentally prepare yourself what is to come. I went out and bought all the things I need for my stay in hospital - toothbrush, towel etc. At the end of it all I was actually 'pumped up' for everything - looking forward to everything getting sorted and starting my journey of recovery.
And then I got a phonecall. My date of operation has been pushed back to the 20th May. Why? Because emergency patients are brought into the hospital for surgery, pushing back waiting list patients. Now I understand the reaon behind this - if I was in their position I would want surgery ASAP. But in a selfish point of view, it has totally thrown me. Now I have a longer wait till my surgery. All my plans are messed up. I was applying to jobs which I had the possibility of attending an interview post-surgery, but now this is very unlikely given the change of date. The worst thing is sitting around and doing nothing. I want to get fixed, and I want it done now! It sounds childish but it's the way I feel. It just seems I've been putting my life on hold for a long time, waiting for this moment and it keeps eluding me.
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Obviously this isn't the exact same situation but I applied for my first job ever and was told I'd hear if I got shortlisted on April 28th. We were told on this date that we now have to wait 'til May 6th because of all the applicants, which threw me too! I get what you mean about preparing, you need to feel 'ready' don't you and not that you're just on a conveyor belt going through the motions like a piece of meat.
ReplyDeleteSorry to read about the delay...ugh!
ReplyDeleteHang in there!
Jim